Cousin Rufus on the Economy
We hear a lot about the economy in the news. I thought it would be fun to rework a former post about life in the big city seen through the eyes of a mountain man.
Dear Cousin Cletus,
Hope this finds you doin’ good. Me and ol’ Bozo are doin’ right well, considerin’ the visits we git from the Ritis brothers. Arthur is the worst.
I finally took me a visit to town last week, to whut they call civilization. Makes me wonder why they call it civilization, when it looks more like the pitures we see in National Geographic magazine.
Ah had to go with Harley to take his lil girl to the Urgent Care place while ah was there. Looked like they had to scrape the bottom of the barrel to find workers. The nurse that checked us in had a name tag with a woman's name. It had a woman's voice, but its whole head was shaved except for a little patch right on top about the size of the palm of my hand. And on that patch was a bun like Mama used to wear on top of her head. Poor thing. The one that checked us at the front desk looked like she fell into a tackle box, face first. They must have a hard time finding regular folks to work these days.
Cletus, I think the economy must be purty bad outside the holler. Ah guess there’s a shortage of cloth, cause I seen grown wimmen paradin’ around in little girls’ dresses. Some even wears shirts with holes in ‘em, right on the shoulders. Maybe the moths were bad this year. Poor things. My Maudie, bless her dear departed soul, used ta sleep in more clothes than whut I seen out on the street. I guess the mamas in the big city is too busy laborin’ over the scrub board to tell the girls whut’s proper an’ all.
You oughta see the hairstyles out there, Cletus! I think the economy must be bad on the young men, cause they’s usin’ lard or somethin’ to make their hair stand straight up. No foolin’! I even seen a couple men with bobs on top of their heads, like Mama used to wear.
Hard times must have fell on a lot of folks outside the holler, but they made a way to entertain theyselves. They draw pitures all over their bodies. Really! Even some wimmen is drawin’ flowers and words on their skin. Makes me wonder how many Sharpies it took to finish the job. I guess when yer that poor, you gotta do somethin’ to cheer yourself up.
Well, it’s time to git this letter up to Lem’s General Store and git it posted. Maybe while I’m there I’ll splurge and git me a bottle o’ orange sodee pop. The economy seems all right here in the holler, where folks is normal. Y’all come visit sometime.
Your Cuz,
Rufus
How about you? Any comments on life in the big city? Or our culture? Tell us in the box below.
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